Wednesday, April 27, 2016

2016 Goals Recap - April

Hey dreamers! Here is the latest update on my goals for 2016.  Hope you enjoy watching!

Click here to read more about 7 experiment.  And click here for the link to my newsletter. I am excited to be sharing with you some of what I have been learning in school this year!  

Sunday, April 17, 2016

Why Don't We "Just" Adopt??

If I had a dollar for every time someone told us the story about a "friend" they knew who was struggling to get pregnant, decided to adopt, and then got pregnant right after that.... well.... then maybe we'd actually be able to afford an adoption.

This is one of the most common "suggestions" or "comforting encouragements" I have heard while going through our fertility journey lately.  I know it's meant well, but it sure does make me want to punch someone in the face.

It is so much more complicated that "just" adopting.  It's not like we can go pick out a baby to adopt tomorrow and that's that.

Also, I would never adopt just so that I could somehow magically get pregnant - as if that were the formula for ending infertility.

Lastly, if Doad and I are not feeling God's call to pursue adoption, it would be just as unfruitful (pardon the pun) to go down that road.  We have to do what we feel led to do, and while adoption is a dream of ours in the future, neither of us feel that God is leading us to that option at the moment.

This post is a little bit sassy, because I've run out of patience for answering this question.  But for the sake of transparency, I want to share it anyway.  Doad and I have been very open about our journey for several reasons: 1) Your prayers and support have meant the world to us as we walk through this season of waiting and losses, that wouldn't have been as available to us if we had not shared 2) We hope to bring purpose to our struggle by being a source of comfort, encouragement, and solidarity to others in similar situations and 3) God deserves glory, no matter what the circumstances.  As we struggle and wrestle through this we want to share the goodness of God in our dark moments, His faithfulness in our weak moments, and His unending love, even when we can't see the full picture.

So I share this with you so that you can better understand why we've not chosen to pursue adoption yet.  So that you can better know how to pray for us as we make tough choices like this.  So that you can be better equipped to provide comfort to other couples who are maybe making the same tough decision.  And so you can stop telling that story already.  Coming from this fertility-challenged mama, it's just not helpful... for me anyway.

So there you have it, a short (yes, short) answer to why we don't "just" adopt already.

Disclaimer: I do not know the mind of God, so don't be mad if I publish this post and two days later He tells us to pursue adoption.  I will gladly eat my words if that means we get to finally add a baby to our family. ;)

Saturday, February 20, 2016

2016 Goals

We're halfway through February, so I figured it was about time to share the goals I've set for myself for 2016!  I'm attempting to do this vlog style this year. Let me know what you think! :)

Monday, January 18, 2016

To Baby #2

Sweet, little baby,

This is not how it was supposed to be.  Yesterday was your due date.  If we had it my way, you'd be in my belly about to be born or in my arms being kissed ten thousand times a day.

But it isn't that way.

You had a few short weeks in my belly, but you weren't able to grow where you implanted and so you joined your sibling in heaven.  There you two wait for us to come to you since you didn't get to come to us.

We can't wait to come to you.

We can't wait to meet you.

I don't even know what you look like, but I think about you every day.  I think about how I'd sing to you and cradle you in my arms.  How I want to smother you with kisses and smell your soft little head.  How your dad and I would watch you grow and smile with so much pride over the amazing person you would surely become.

We found out we were pregnant with you while on vacation in Cancun.  There was a beautiful peacock that greeted us several times that week and we decided your nursery would be themed after him with beautiful feathers in shades of green and blue.  Every time I see a peacock it reminds me of you and how happy we were to have you in our lives, however brief.

Oh, how I wish we could have met you.

But someday we will.  And that gives me hope to keep going.  I know Jesus is taking good care of you.  And you are with your sibling.

So while we mourn for our loss, we also look forward expectantly to that joy-filled day when we will finally be able to see each other face-to-face.  And I will hold you and kiss you and tell you in person how very, very much I love you.  We miss you and we love you so much, sweetheart.  See you soon.